“Allah has given a man superiority over a woman to protect her, to be gentle to her and to be her companion and her mentor. This superiority has not been given to mistreat a woman and demand her submission even when the man is wrong or where even if the man is not wrong, the woman has a different point of view. The superiority does not mean that only the woman’s imperfections appear as neon signs to a man. Just as the punctuation in the Arabic language, the zer, zabar, pesh have been given different levels i.e. one is above, one is below etc. and each have been used to give an alphabet and a Quranic word a whole meaning, similarly, a woman’s imperfections should be seen alongwith the good things about her, which appear lesser in value to a man because of the things he chooses to see and things he does not. Similarly a woman should also not make the man’s perfections as the highlights to her journey. These imperfections and perfections make a human beautiful. Each individual should remember that the other person is a human being created with as much love as was undertaken to create another human.”- Mom. <3
A wedding? What is it? To me, it is absolutely nothing. A moment gone. What is important is the marriage. :)
And the marriage is tricky. It takes a while to get to know each others habits and even more time to meet each other’s expectations. But once each spouse starts taking baby steps towards better understanding each other, life becomes simple.
What i have truly figured out is that most of the times it is the wife who can easily resolve things or blow them out of proportion. There are usually two options- bring on the ego or suppress anger and make the hubby understand things with a lot of patience, love and CARE.
A lot of times it is really not about you or the husband either- but about others. It is not personal. It is about the need to protect the wife or the husband from possible negative things that other people may say.
Sometimes, a bad moment is simply because you are being missed or he is being missed.
Yet, honesty is the KEY. Honesty in your dealings. Honesty in the relationship. Honesty in your efforts. If either one of you are being dishonest to each other or about each each other to any third party, then that is asking for trouble. That is not the right approach.
With commitment, patience, understanding and a lot of compromise, marriage is contentment. But if you view things with a shade of ego and right vs. wrong, things may get difficult.
Flowing from my previous post here about our Nikah anniversary, here are details of what we did that day.
We cut a rather confused looking , yet fresh and delicious cake purchased by dearest hubby. Yep! I can see this was bought in a hurry. :p
These pictures have been taken from a sturdy basic camera so yeah, no glamour here. :)
We watched a play in the theater. Nope, we had not planned this to celebrate the anniversary. I actually had free tickets to the event and this was on the cards a week back. The theatrical play “Aangan Terrha” is actually an adaptation of the television serial presented by the PTV network in the late 1980s. Infact the television serial was really popular in the 1980’s and it will do you good and give you the much needed laughter if you decide to watch it here.
If you are in Karachi and still have not watched this. I strongly urge you to go and see this. You will not be disappointed. In the end, hubby dear gave a standing ovation to Anwar Maqsood. :)
To my surprise, hubby dear took me out for a very late dinner afterwards to Arizona Grill. He ordered the Twin Steak and i ate some Pasta Spinoccoli. It was some great tasting food.
Believe it or not but me and hubby hardly exchanged a few words through watching the play and the dinner for reasons best known to us. ;) But with a small thank you note waiting for him pinned to his pillow, bygones were bygones and we were friends again. AlHamdulilAllah.
Here is hoping the coming anniversaries are better and more brilliant and AlHamdulilAllah for the current one as well.